Also why the hell should you have to bring Cakes into the office for everyone when it's your birthday? I take the time off to avoid it.

Those weird little things that we're programmed to fit to the side of our toilets?

Toilet duck.

Domestos away.

Parazone exterminator.

Why do we do that?

For about ten years I've been buying those things, irrespective of that, I still clean my toilet, I don't want people coming around to my Secret Hill Top Lair (not that they can get past the portcullis) and seeing an awful bottom stripe, hell, I'll sort that out.

The dangling chemical pouch does not sort that shizzle out.

They cost two sheets them bad boys, bought some Sally Sainsbury's one's, point nine of a queen.

These mo-fo's contain depleted uranium.

Consumer watch, don't buy this stuff.

Believe, I grew up on The Holderness Plain in the nineteen seventies, you want end up like me?

No.

Don't make the kids breathe the chemicals I had to.

Ooh! Do you mean Wisey's, Sandra?

Our friends had a huge lumbering mongrel called Dudley. A wonderful dog who used to drink the blue water out of the bog. We called him Toilet Dud. Much as it pained me to use the T word. The fact that the word 'toilet' is used as part of the brand tells you exactly the sort of people those products are pitched for.

Toiletmy.

Have you been drinking again Wormy?

what would you rather it was called? Lavatory Llama, ter su, bog buffalo?

Any of the above, Smallie dear, all are acceptable and do not attempt to polish a turd.

I'm loathe to invent names for a product when it is that product itself which is most offensive - Sandra is quite right- but if I was forced I'd be tempted by Bog Bug or Loo Tube. Or Lavvie Larvae, for Ginge's Crapper (I know, another brand name, but [ioriginal[/i). Nowt should substitute a bog brush and a bit of bleach, though.

Bleach doesn't kill bugs u know it just stains the pot white

A popular myth probably perpetrated by those manufacturers of fancy, less-effective products like Toilet Duck, designed to appeal to the appalled sensibilities of the self-proclaimed 'middle classes'. In fact, bleach is the king of germ killers, and faster-working too. Keep it quiet, though, or fancy 'fragranced' and coloured poor, or rather, extremely expensive imitations could become redundant.

AND it it keeps the pot white too! Hurrah for bleach and rubber gloves!

What good is staining the pot white? I've got a green bath, sink and ter. It's real nice.

Surely we are all going to 'pop off' at some point though LLR?
Or is there a special 'pop off' that only those who have had a resurrection get?

In answer to the Question Sandy. So she wants flowers for not being dead then you should ask for a Vietnamese ladyboy for the same reason.

Well after smashing my screen on my iPhone I have just repaired it and I was easier than I thought. Plus I payed £5.50 instead of £50 which was nice.

Seems to be a common fault with iPhones that.

Been wracking my brains but I cannot think of a sporting event worse than The Boat Race.