Can you tell me the team for the Salford match as soon as possible please because a couple of the lads, Berro and Kingy, need to be back early to go on the p!ss Friday night, so is it ok to arrange an injury for them both. Thacks has a pre arranged bookies appointment so perhaps he could pull a hamstring or have leg strain or sommat aswell please. It seems pointless promoting any of the reserves in their places because we would need to up their money, and all that, added to that if any of them played well you'd get the pheasants in the stands calling for their inclusion every week so perhaps you could have a word with Gary and try to get us a couple of the Rhino's cheapo's to keep us going. I'll get Wilf to do a write up about these prospects coming from Leeds, and promoting them to our mushrooms as soon as you tell me their names and positions. It won't matter about any background info or stats cause Wilf will make some up anyway.

Do you need me to give the pre match team talk for you at the Willows on friday because i assume you'll be at Headingley watching your lads. Its no problem iv'e got the notes from the last six games, i'll just change the names when you let me know who is selected. Just an important point i'd like you to bear in mind about my post match conference last weekend .......the coffee was cr@p, youv'e been buying that netto stuff again haven't you.

Also could you have a word with Jon please, i caught him and his geordie signing whispering earlier...i'm sure he's getting the lads to alter my game plan to try and get my job....and if you could get the lads to allow me to substitute them sometimes it would be appreciated....i'm sure some of the mushrooms are beginning to notice they refuse to leave the field until they see your finger wagging from the boardroom.

Regards,
Alan.(Richards dad)....someones got to look after my lad

P.S. Iv'e had some Aussie guy on saying his visa decision is due next week but he's managed to get a drunk and disordely in so he can continue with the present arrangement, he reckons why should he work for his money when he carry on with the present arrangement.

You are a VERY strange man/woman.

Who is Alan?

A Rovers fan taking the p!ss......How unique.

Show me a man/woman who isn't!

Your a very sad sad lonely man!!!!!


Always remember - no matter how bad Man Utd become- Man City will never become the biggest team in the city.....

because - WE RE THE BEST SUPPORTED TEAM
WE HAVE A LONGER HISTORY
WE HAVE ACHIEVED MORE
WE HOLD A BIGGER FAN BASE
WON MORE TROPHIES
HAVE A BIGGER GROUND
HAVE AGRADE A LICENCE
DONT HOLD CAR BOOT SALES
HAVE THE BIGGEST SPONSOR IN SUPER LEAGUE

Rovers need to learn their place - regardless they will always be the poorer relation!!!!

and your team is doing exactly what on the pitch of late?

You really do take banter to a whole new level..you are totally obsessed, are you even slightly interested in rugby league.

Sorry to dissapoint but although your statement is correct, will shortly be HAD
Also it doesn't matter how big it is it's what they do with it

Rovers number one TV fan

Whoops!

Winner of the most necessary....



...post of 2009.