The pie fillings look like a product of the norovirus

Chicken Balti Pie - stale artery blocking pastry infused with mildly spiced and aromatic norovirus by-product.

Anyone up for the Minced Beef and Onion Pie description?

I had a Pie once.

Once.

I'd driven over from Wessie Land and hadn't had any tea, Mr. Liftshare part of The Skein wasn't there to advise against, although, he is a gormclops Vegan so all of his opinions are naturally immediately dismissed.

If I'd wanted to put Krakatoa into my mouth, I'm sure I could have dug up and lit a gas main at far less expense.

The lack of flavour was compensated by the amount of fibrous mouth roof tissues that constituted my diet for the next week.

Priceless, but how can we precis that gem into a meaningful product description? Try this.

Chicken Balti Pie - A cross between Krakatoa and an exploding gas main with creamy mouth melting Norovirus sauce. A true cultural taste sensation guaranteed to make your derriere look like the Japanese flag for at least a week.

PATTIES thats what we miss down south they do not know what one is and Yorkshire cheese cakes loverly grub