Quote Monko="Monko"For me the best thing about the mag was the top tips page.
X-FILES fans. Create the effect of being abducted by aliens by drinking two bottles of vodka. You’ll invariably wake up in a strange place the following morning, having had your memory mysteriously “erased”.
SAVE money on expensive personalised car number plates by simply changing your name to match your existing plate – Mr KVL 741Y AVOID jet lag by simply taking an earlier flight, thus arriving fully refreshed and on time.
PUTTING just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes’ eyes bulge and causes them to swim in an amusing manner.
THICKEN runny, low-fat yogurt by stirring in a spoonful of lard.
A NEXT door neighbour’s car aerial, carefully folded, makes an ideal coat hanger in an emergency.
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DETER goldfish from having sex by throwing a small bucket of air over any you catch in the act.
SWEETCORN fans. Save money on loo paper by simply pouring the stuff straight down the pan.
INVITED by vegetarians for dinner? As you’d no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours – ask for a nice steak.
AVOID parking tickets by leaving your windscreen wipers turned to “fast wipe” whenever you leave your car parked illegally.
OLD contact lenses make ideal portholes for small model boats.'"
The best top tip i remember was for people who lived below an airports flight path,
it told them to paint a large blue rectangle in their back garden and make flight passengers believe they have a swimming pool
