Two really old ones:-

Leigh were playing at Liverpool City, and Derek Hurt dropped the ball. "Why doesn't tha pick it up Hurt?" came the cry. "He can't, he's got a glass back!" shouted my mate, who was stood beside me. It was an unnerving experience to suffer Derek's glare in our direction!

Leigh were playing W***n at Hilton Park, and a Leigh player placed a towering kick, above that great entertainer, Henderson Gill. The light ball swirled in the wind, and bounced of Gill's shaved head, into touch. One booming voice was heard above a 10,000 crowd - "In off the black (no racism intended), that's seven away." All the crowd and players heard it, including Gill, who was doubled up in laughter!

Best i ever heard was at Hilton Park years ago ,when the police used to bring two police horses to the game and stand at the side of the pitch. One paticular day one of the horses was being ridden by a female police officer in the middle of a red hot summer.A young lad shouted to her "GI THI HORSE A DRINK LOVE IT FAVERS TIRED". To which the woman officer said quick as a flash , "If you had been between my legs all day like this horse has, you be knakered to" . The lad just went bright red and never said owt for the rest of the match ... FANTASTIC!!!