I smashed a full chicken extra hot with chips platter last night, for the win.

When your push bike misses a gear going up hill.

- Gordon Ramsey. I'd love to stamp on his face.

- Drivers that overtake me on the motorway, pull infront of me and then brake. WTF !!! Just stay behind me in the first place !!!

- Davina McCall and her annoying gurning as she stares into the camera.

- The woman who walks her dog behind our house who collects up her dogs mess (and rightly so) into a clear bag, holds it up right infront of her face, and lovingly stares at it thinking no-one is watching. Well I'm watching you lady, and your weird ! In fact, are you the dog world's Gillian McKeith of Callands ?

- Motorway signs that flash fog warnings at you. Without them i'd never know it was foggy.

- Motorway signs that flash speed restrictions when you haven't moved more than 5 metres in the past hour. Grrrrr.

- Ainsley Harriot. A TV Chef with very little culinary skills, & has less appeal than an STD. I'd love to stamp on his face too.

- Paying a license fee to the BBC. Should be a self funded organisation. I'd happily watch adverts on the Beeb to save my contributions.

- People that say 'the books way better than the film.'........ YAWN. I don't read books, I probably never will, and I don't care if you do. Films are easier to follow and don't take up my time as much.

- Jamie Oliver. I'm struggling to think of anyone else on this planet who annoys me more than this spitting imbecile. He might as well put a big sign around his neck with the words 'please give me knighthood, I'm really desperate.' If he did we might be spared another channel 4 crusade where he trys to convince the nation our kids shouldn't eat things they like, like chips, pizza or sweets. MESSAGE FOR YOU JAMIE..... KIDS LIKE EATING THINGS THAT ARE BAD FOR THEM.... GET OVER IT !!!!

John Inverdale

Lazy ar535 (ALWAYS IN 4X4s) who leave their vehicles stradling the pavement/roadway of the John Lewis entrance to the Trafford Centre, when there's 1000's of empty spaces starting 30 yards away...

That underground car park in the town centre, it's fine apart from the people that decide to park outside of the actual parking spaces and take up the road...

This

That man = massive tool

I've always wanted to open a shop up next to one of those Jamie's Italian places and call it 'No he's not'.

Ex Liverpool players, who, after a bad defeat/run, say "that's not good enough for Liverpool Football Club"......just say Liverpool, we all know it's a football club. It's almost as annoying as people who talk about themselves in the third person...self-importance or what?

People who call me young man....I'm 42 FFS, don't patronise.

The Padgate Rose, when they wont even slightly alter their Sunday TeaTime banquet.....I don't want the sweet, it's awful, I only want a portion of noodles to compensate for not wanting the sweet, I'm not asking them to remove a limb!

People who spend half their life on Facebook, telling everyone that they're going for a bath, having soup for tea, dreading the ironing.

Work colleagues who insist in telling the whole world their business...I'm not intersted that "our 'so and so' is up in court again/ my 16 year old daughter is pregnant and she's split up with the daddy...it's like having Jeremy Kyle replayed at work

haha fair play that is seriously odd !! I think you should secretly film her, Youtube it and post the link on here

I agree with loads of these. Which surely makes them rational rather than irrational?

Chuggers get my bloody goat.

"care to donate to our charity?"

"er, yeah, here you go - here's a quid"

"Oh no, I'll need your bank details to set up a monthly direct debit - you'll get a magazine every six weeks".

WTF? Ingrates.

Nope, I'm still lost

Still 'piddles' me off in supermarkets, when they change the lay-out around. DRIVES ME MAD.