Hey you! Get your nose out of my my rants! What the hell do you know? You post pubescent, Shetland Island, boat burning, fish loving, neo-Scandinavian, law enforcing, oil refining, croft building, seagull watching, Scalloway dwelling, dog loving, child producing, archipelago hopping lump (very big lump).

Your Mother was a Hamster and your Father smelt of aftershave.

P.S. Love to the girls and I'll give you a "bell" tomorrow.

There's an incestuous trend to this thread......
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Still as long as you keep it all in the family eh?

Hey!!!............Now I consider you to be a real gent and intellectual: So I'm not going to reply to those scandalous accusations concerning my DNA.

just beware though I've not had a drink all through Christmas and New Year so I'm feeling a bit "punchy"



All the best

absolutely brilliant mate

best thread ever

I can hear it now from the Shed...

...Last gasp tackle on Patten towards the touchline and all you can hear from the touch judge is "GET OI VEY, GET OI VEY!"

I'll get me coat...

Yeah mate I can see it now: Ref Tacklestein (Tel Aviv) to Ray Cashmere, "listen my boy, don't be a schmuck and be quviet, you were offsideish already".

Can't wait for those Kosher Burgers and Matzo's when the new season starts.

Btw Feka Palea'aesina rhymes with hava nagila..

Don't tempt the budding songwriters in the shed to try and work that into new song.

We could even re-name the vault as: wait for it..................."Bar Mitzvah": orthodox beers for orthodox fans. shock:

This play on words has reminded me of something. Many years ago I met Jim Arnison at The Willows prior to a game and I could see that something had amused him: so I asked him what it was.

He said that he'd spoken to a woman as he was walking down Tootal Drive as she was standing outside her house and that she had complained to him that her house was so damp that she had "compensation running down the windows".

A funny guy was Jim.

'Bar Mitzvah'

Now that's class.

And after a ten day self-prescribed absence from the moronically inane nonsense that has become increasingly viral on internet forums, my faith in the Turkey is reinstilled over the course of the last 20 or so posts. Thanks chaps!