No thanks. 3 reasons.

1. His name bugs me - Kirk as a surname should not have a letter "e" at the end.
2. He is decidedly ugly
3. He is not very good.

Fine at Leeds where they can afford to have a journeyman in the squad but we are needing signings that would make an impact.

Ian Kirke is one of those players that when he signs for your team, everyone says he's underrated and a workhorse. When he is about to leave your team, or he signs for someone else, he's useless, a fairy and has never been any good.

The truth exists somewhere inbetween. But I'm more inclined to go towards the latter.

Being from Donny Kirke is no doubt hung like a donkey, a great hit with the girls & hard as nails. Unbelievably he is a very average rugby player.

Three qualities but only one of any help on a rugby pitch - during game time - unless you are a bit of an exhibitionist

Jesus I hope that's not true! We're told money's tight and we're not able to afford to spend the salary cap then we find out the club are considering spending money on decomposing corpses

Ha ha, you clearly remember Wagga's helicopter!!

To look at the situation in a realistic manner, we're only going to be able to afford 'average' players for a while and we've already been told there will be no 'marquee' signings. Hopefully, at worst, we can hold on to the above average ones we've already got but I think a few could do with winding their expectations in a bit.

At the end of the day, a team of 'average' players should leave us in the middle of SL, given where we are, I'd take that for the next couple of years.

That explains why I never made it as a player.

I never saw you play, but if your sidestep away from the bar is anything to go on, I think you're being modest.

Me & buying a round go together like Jamie Foster & tackling.

I saw tigs play. I told Paul Deacon about it and Deacs shed tears he was so overwhelmed by the description. Come to think of it I did the same while Brian was playing in my team.

I have played against a number of Bradford's most legendary feared forwards, but none compares to the pain of tag rugby.

Edit for greater accuracy.

Your own fault for playing commando

Iron Karl Pryce would've been proud of you that day