have you tried syrup of figs

Ha. That's my best sorry face. The constipated face IS very similar but the eyes are more rolled up into the back of my head.

The bells palsy makes them all look similar.

Stavros Flattley

In a sensational twist, new images have emerged of the secret brother locked in the attic

Productive morning.

And productive morning to you, too.

Sadly that's no longer topical. Can you morph me with someone who has barely two pennies to rub together?

I would but I've had a jolly good ticking off already this morning from hindle for wasting my time, and don't want another flea in my ear.
=#FFFFFFYes I know it's feckin Branson, FFS
It's good that there are people out there able to spend productive mornings posting on forums so that they can comment about other people posting on forums though.

I was going to morph you with Richard Branston, on the basis that we just move from one pickle to another.

Yes, yes. Thou shalt not question the vark, etc. etc.

I apologise, the next pic can go on the fridge. No need to get cheesed off.

Oh my.

I've concluded you just don't get my sense of humour.

Bit of bants innit.

And the worst part of all, there was no condiment pun.

OTOH, Elkie Brooks was very good in her Vinegar Joe days