Twas in the year of 98, or so we do believe
That three wise men from Odsal Top set out one Christmas Eve
They followed a star to a land afar, the rest, as they say is history
For unto us a child was born and we shall call him Zisti

We need a saviour for our team, they explained to young Nick’s mother
He must come with us to the Yorkshire hills - one way or the other
A shadow of doubt could be seen, in old Mrs Zisti’s eye
But the deal was sealed with gifts surreal - a pint, a pilchard, a pie

So it came to pass that Nick ran out, to the roar of the Odsal crowd
His swarthy looks, his manly gait, made young girls weep out loud
The crowd held their breath as the ball went wide, the air could not have been stiller
But he didn’t do much and was bundled in touch, more God awful than Godzilla

Only seven more times did he pull on the shirt of which we are justly proud
But he had as much chance of scoring a try as I have with Girls Aloud
Then the dark side called, and a villa was found at the foot of Appendectomy Hills*
But try as he might, he was still complete sh**e, poor Zisti – the man with no skills



*The Appendectomy Hills - a well know Italian resort that provides accommodation for failed Rugby League players seeking to earn a few quick lira playing Rugby Union

I think we have won already if the maths stack up as long as 2 of our team enter the poetry comp

Doesn't rhyme.

Bulls
[iHuge like Godzilla
But sometimes play like pilchards
Cause Bullectomy[/i

I know you are the opposition but still this deserves a

Not at all, but each person will only get a mark for what the judge decides is their best effort.


Need more maths class

Does one person per team go out?

Or one person out of all of the contestants?

The culture & intelligence of Paul Deacon is God will shine through on this one. With the obvious exception of Mystic Eddie of course.
Good work by Pimp on the last chav game, you took one for the team.

Even my paint skills are naff, so I had to try make up for not entering by redeeming myself and trying to earn my right to be in the team!!

Been offline for a bit due to unforseen "issues". However, time to start making amends. My masterpiece will be unveiled shortly...

Ye Pow'rs wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o 'fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!


Nice work mate.

I wish McNamaras' dad had a vasectomy
Before young Steve was conceived
For four weeks his mum thought he was a bellyache
Brought on by eating dodgy pilchards for tea.
She hopped to the quacks for a check-up
And found out that a babby was due
"My goodness!" she thought, "this wasn't planned"
What on earth am I gonna do???

The elder banana was scunnered
And certainly wanted no thanks
If only he kept his appointment
He would only have been firing blanks
"This boy will confound all his critics!"
And prove everybody is wrong
"The finest young foetus in all of the land"
Will be a super coach in not very long.

But we all the truth is quite different
He wasn't much cop of a boss
I wish his old mum had a headache
Or his father just fancied a toss
And then maybe we would be up there
As a quality Rugby League side
But He came along and destroyed us
And send us on our downhill slide
Why us? What did we do? It really ain't fair
To burden us with such a clown
He got far too long in the hotseat
When he should have been chased out of town

He had a habit of getting occasional wins
Our win at St Helens was flukey
He had no fight for the battle
Godzilla? More like Godzukie
But he brought us the Warlord
And yon St Hilaire
With signings like that
He showed he DID care
But sadly it all went quite horribly wrong
So he left to take over his nation
"How the feck did he get that job?"
As we all sought a good explaination

So thank you Steve for ruining us
And letting Mick Potter take over.
We are finally back and the future is bright
But England RL will never fall lower.

That is absolute class!

I knew ME would mellow, there was a time when I would've bet a shedload of money that he would never have conceded McNamara was rugby league related