Well, apart from the above, only ONE other entry was received, so the entries are as follows, in order of entryTerrace singer
1) Take chairs apart and beat them with them.
2) Get the bulls players to charge them down
3) climb up the pilons and kick them off when they climb up
4) go over to the tunnel and scare them with the bulls red eyes.
5) Start singing rugby songs to scare them away.
6) hide under the chairs
7) die
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1. Don't get bit by zombies on entering the Coral stand- this should be the fall back plan should any of steps 2-9 fail!!!
2. Lock the doors of every entrance to the building - I know this sounds obvious but Zombies don't tend to knock and wait for permission to enter so I'd say this is a simple and effective tactic to slow their progress.
3. Change into my specially prepared clothing and footwear from my Zombie Apocalypse survival bag (oh yeah, I always carry one) - In this case I've chosen a high quality running shoe and a "where's wally" outfit. How many times have you struggled to find wally? Well now imagine you're a zombie... i might as well have an invisibilty cloak!!!
4 Arm yourself - Find weapons which you could crush the heads of the walking dead. Baseball bats and thankfully i've packed on in my zombie survival bag.
5. Look for survivers - you will need the support of others but avoid overweight chubby people where possible.... they tend to be slow and moan a lot so sacrifice them and give the zombies so fresh meat. The bigger the sacrifice the longer they will take to consume!!!
6. Stay hydrated - Head to the Trevor Foster bar and load up on bottles of spirits and water - water for long term survival and the spirits to use as flaming weapons onto the living dead from the balconies overlooking the pitch. Nibbles such as crisps and nuts could also help with hunger.
7. Find food by any means necessary - its going to take a while for the government to find you... (they bearly know where Bradford is so good luck on locating a rugby league ground) so you'll need some food. Luckily Omar has loads of Curries and Sundries in supply for the upcoming events so everyone can eat well before suffering a day later on the bogs!
8. Ensure everyone stays together - split the group up at your peril. become group leader and command everyine to stay in the murrayfield suite.
9. Man up - there are going to be some casualties and if anyone happens to be bit i'd have to kill them before they killed me. For additional safety, consider killing those not bit as well. It means there is less chance of them being turned and it sends a message out to the thick ones that you mean business.
10. Once you've killed everyone, go insane and start to decide if its better to kill yourself or be turned. In this case i think i'd take a positive approach. Zombies look like they're having a good time so what the hell, why not join them.... unlock the doors and jump on the bandwagon, just like all the millions of facebook and twitter users out there!!!
Lucky Luke
1. Get Terrace Singer to perform one of his songs.
2. Become invisible by pretending to be Nick Zisti.
3. Put my coat on backwards – this will make the zombies think I am running away.
4. Dress up as a clown. Zombies won’t eat them as they taste funny.
5. Send out a call for Captain Anagram and let his magic powers turn the Zombie Apocalypse into a lacy bosom. Zippee!
6. Invite the zombies into my living room.
7. Tell the zombies that I am delighted to see them as my hobby is necrophilia.
8. Stand in a bucket of custard, cover myself with cream and put a cherry on my head. That will show the zombies that I am not a man to be trifled with.
9. Shout and shout until I am a little ho – then let Mystic Eddie saddle me up and ride me off into the sunset.
10. Poke a Leeds fan with a sharp stick whilst chanting ‘you should have taken the two’. This won’t stop the apocalypse but it will make the last few minutes on earth quite satisfying.
Shamefully, PDIG is clearly a team of quitters, and rather than keep going til the end, they have slunk away into a corner on their miserable quitter arrses.
And so there were two, one of which has two entries, the other only one.
Let the final judging commence. Mince pies, sherry and turkey permitting.