Terribly sorry old bean but homie dont rep like dat.

It was 35 in Tokyo at the weekend and now I'm in Germany - "cooler, three veeks".

Homie

Kiss my grits playa

A man walks into a petrol station and says, "Can I please have a KitKat Chunky?"

The lady behind the till gets him a KitKat Chunky and brings it back to him.

"No," says the man, "I wanted a normal KitKat, you fat b.itch."

My diet really paid off then.

Seems as though Northern Rail have responded to the heatwave by turning off the aircon in all the commuter trains on the Airedale Line. Last night and this morning I thought I was going to keel over in the heat. You can't even open a window on these things because they're fitted with air con so why turn it off?

If they keep this up they'll be calling ambulances to every station between Leeds and Skipton. I intend to use the car if it continues. At least I can wind a window down.

I was in a meeting in Wolverhampton yesterday, which is bad enough at the best of times. Yesterday, stuck in a small office with no air-con and a projector blasting out hot air (bit like me!) for hours on end was terrible.

Luckily, both the Cross-Country train and the Trans-Pennine Express had their air conditioning working lovely, so I could at least relax during my journey. I also had the joy of kicking someone out of my reserved seat on a packed train

The only problem ( ) was once I reached Dewsbury, where as usual the train to Morley seemed to keep knocking. Over 3 hours I had to wait there, good job I found something to pass the time!

The West riding?

PS, you could walk from Dewsbury to Morley in about 2 hours!

some of the women that are in Headingley this afternoon have made me get a sweat on

Nervous? its natural to be afraid of women when your little.

Wait a miniute your in your 20's............................

no...sunshine sheilas are out