You're more likely to alienate yourself by the company you choose to keep. Ditch Danny and you'll be welcomed everywhere!

They may not feign injury, but they do burst into tears roughly every 8 seconds, before proclaiming that singing is "their life" and how hard they've worked (by the age of 17 without ever having had a job while touring the pubs and clubs with 5 people in a clapped out van). Nauseating.

However, I will agree that feigning injury in professional football is really nauseating. It's another area in which Sunday League football is far better to watch than the professional game. If somebody starts rolling around and pretending to be hurt, they will usually find that their next possession of the ball ends in a real reason to stay down. Legally, of course.

I find football to be the most frustrating sport on the face of the earth. For me there is no feeling of catharsis, just constant build up of stresses and tension at some of the 'quality' on display. I follow the results, but often struggle to make it through highlights, never mind a full 90 mins. I dip my toe in the waters only to keep up with basic knowledge of 'the beautiful game' for social purposes.

To respond to the comment about too dim to engage in small talk, in my experience it can often be that the other party is too dim to discuss anything other than football or the weather, so to stay on safe ground can be best so as not to offend.

Yes they do. How many battle through "throat infections" every year?

But its their life.

VERY!!!!

End of thread.

At great risk to my health Emma, shouldn't you and Shabba stick to washing up and cleaning rather than watching football?

Get with the times love, we have dishwashers now!

We've always had them but the modern ones don't have headaches or moan when we get blathered with the lads!!

My dishwasher has size 4 feet, which means she can get closer to the sink than me with my size 12's

I bloody knew you lot would come out with something sarcastic. I mean, what was I thinking not putting the word MECHANICAL

thats why women get married in white.
to match the fridge,freezer, washer.........................

Why did the woman cross the road?


Wait, better question, why is she out of the kitchen!?

lad, you would never EVER say that when your Mrs is around, come on