We take it in turns

Your shanter is 2 days out of date

ASDA open 24 hours a day my a[ir[/ise.


I woke up this morning after a twenty minute nap in a jubilant mood simply because I’ve put 1 + 1 together and came up with the answer. Going downstairs my dad was about to get off to work and I asked him for a lift to the local ASDA as I believed it was a 24 hour one. Well they have the sign -



Anyways it didn’t open till eight and I got to ASDA at 7You Can’t leave ASDA without Booze.


This ed me off greatly so as soon as I got in the store I had a row and a fight with the male receptionist. As you can see on the picture above I took his coat off him as a trophy of winning that fight. It wasn’t really someone else’s jacket - it was mine from when I did slave labour at ASDA. I plan to burn my ASDA stuff later on and I can confirm the ashes certainly won’t be getting an urn. I’ll probably film these events and upload them onto Youtube later on.

I needed something to calm me down


After my ASDA trip I bobbed to the sandwich shop to get my favourite meal - ham baguette and a butterfly bun. I love that sandwich shop to bits because I have great rapport with the till clerk/owner. As you can see my sisters dog is a little get and trying to share the meal with me.

He doesn’t go without though.


I got him quite a few treats from ASDA and that is just one of them. I’m always treating him because I haven’t got a lass to wine and dine. Ladies if you’re single, interested and want treats like my sisters dog then I really recommend you get in touch. The amount of toys he’s had

Still.


I couldn’t leave my good old self out and this is what I plan to do for today. Just chill on my Dads own made pavilion that he made out of scraps of wood. He’s an absolute genius is my dad when it comes to garden stuff like this. Me?

I’m just a good for nothing layabout and for once I’m embracing what I am. Before someone goes and have a go at me for wasting tax payers money I’m not. My parents have worked for many years now and I’m claiming it all back for them by giving them board out of my dole money. After someone my age died last week I couldn’t give a anymore and I plan to live the rest of my life how I want to.

Lets face it the only career option I have is criminal enterprise.

All that’s just trivial anyways.

Here’s to the good life and I’ve had plenty of it. Ok I may not get much but I get little tastes now and again and that’s good enough for me

Damo

Thats the biggest pile of in that whole post!

I bet the only reason you know how to spell labour was because of those red signs in the grass verges around May time!

There’s plenty of people in the world to correct spellings.

They’ll only ever be one of me!

And to that, I thank the Lord! Heck, i might even say a prayer tonight.

Damo you wont hear this very often from me but thanks you have just made my depressingly sjit day slightly better by making me laugh out loud, especially this bit

Thanks for the compliments and I’ve found out that alcohol really isn’t my friend.

Putting the world to right with the planks of my dads pavilion really isn’t the way forward. Sam Buca once said he could see me talking to a plank and he was right. Passer by where gathering outside my house to watch me roll. It reminded me of when me and my mates used to watch this alcoholic women on my street called Dippy Doreen - she was a legend!

Either way I’m going to pop to my Grans house in the countryside this afternoon and then who knows where I’ll head next?

I have some mates from Halifax which isn’t too far from my Grans house. Then again I’ll probably just head off into Leeds and party on my own. Dancing is my life. When that music hits me I can feel it flow through my body all the way from my ears to my feet. That's when the funk starts and I can't help but do what I've been trained to do. The feeling of enrichment that comes from slapping my shoes on the dance floor and waving my arms around like an escaped mental patient makes everything worth it. If only my love for dancing was a food, I could use it to feed the world and no person would ever have to fall asleep feeling hungry. People keep telling me it's not possible, but I'm still dancin'. It'll take an army to stop me from dancin' God damnit!

I’ll let you know how I get on but my zest for life is back!

Pond life that is…

Work?

I’m terminally unemployed. Even the job centre has confirmed it!

I can confirm that Damo is a real person and not a figment of some lame attempt at comedy.

I think todays material has been his best for a while actually... although that isn't saying too much.

I’ve done a lot of walking today and will be using my sisters electronic foot massage. It’ll do a lot of good for my feet before their head for the dancefloor tonight!

Also how did invincible get on with them lot from Castleford?

That was quite a story