I've been to those gigs as well!

I like this!...well done Brew...made me laugh!!!

And a tazer is nothing in comparison!

Teacher asks her class if anyone knows a story from the bible.

Little Johnny raises his hand and says "Yes miss , i can tell you about David and Goliath ",

"Ok, carry on Johnny" says the teacher

"Well, to cut a long story short David killed Goliath , and then he got on his motorbike and ****ed off" said Johnny,

The teacher says "You're right to an extent , David did kill Goliath , but back then they never had motorbikes"

"Yes they did , and i can prove it" replies Johnny ,

Then he opens up his bible turns to page 354 and says "It says in here that when David killed Goliath all you could hear was the roar from his triumph!"

"Lighten the mood"?! Try and have the fortnight we're going through

At least you're not having to put up with gloating Widnes fans.

What's the difference between snot and cauliflower?

Kids will eat snot.

What do you call a gay dinasour?

A megasorass.

It's a brontesore actually!

That's only if it lives in Howarth.