Ditto.

If you are religious, then you'd be worried if the ultimate threat of your User Manual - the Apocalypse - turned out to be nothing more than the odd spot of rain. I mean, some people had to put on a coat, and wellies too. Clearly the ultimate vengeance of a truly mighty deity. Proof enough for me.

Must have been quite bad for the future King to have to put on his wellies and go inspect some land in the hope that it wasn't any of his land for what on earth would one do if ones inheritance was reclaimed by ones deity ?

On a serious note, if you truly believe that the current crop of bad weather is purely down to your deity of choice being unhappy at same-sex marriage, then you really do need help.

What we need is for Kirkstaller to put in an appearance, and direct us towards the appropriate passage in the Bible, where we could get the ecclesiastical equivalent of a two for one offer: Save our Souls, plus an instant reduction in Somerset river levels.

Has to be worth a try as Kay Burley and Charles haven't managed to achieve anything.......

What's Liberace gotta do with the gays? Straight as an arrow that bloke.

I presume back in Biblical time, God must have been using something like Plague 1.0 which was a very primitive OS by today's standards and whilst effective on primitive minds, did not have anywhere near enough RAM to be anything other than a blunt instrument.

However surely in 2014 he must be on something like Plague 7 or Plague 8? Wouldn't this, especially given the advantage of infinite processing power, be able to target plagues like water or locusts or whatever just to the individuals who are for gay marriage, instead of every feckin body, including your entire local fan base?

Or couldn't he better still just send the relevant people a direct Tweet, or FB them?

Turns out he's running Plague Vista. He's trying to use his new Smite2014 application but it keeps telling him he's not got sufficient permissions.

Making sure his kids are full of hate no doubt.

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