FORUMS > The Sin Bin > Jokes Thread 2 |
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 102 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Sep 2008 | 16 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Dec 2019 | Feb 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
Black Backgrounds/Waldorf.gif :Black Backgrounds/Waldorf.gif |
|
| The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex.
Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact on the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.
The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.
Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the mother told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.
The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother, saying,
'Oh Mum! You don't have to worry your head about that! I'm dating Susan!'
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 8012 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Feb 2010 | 15 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Oct 2024 | Sep 2024 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
49863_1309431041.jpg Neither glass half full or empty. Just a realist.:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_49863.jpg |
|
| 'kin 'ell!!!!
Yorkshire's won loads of medals at The Olympics, and they've still got chance of another gold in Peter Sutcliffe with the hammer
I'll get me coat
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Star | 448 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Jul 2012 | 12 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2013 | Jan 2013 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
68081_1343117919.jpg :d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_68081.jpg |
|
| Quote: lefty goldblatt "'kin 'ell!!!!
Yorkshire's won loads of medals at The Olympics, and they've still got chance of another gold in Peter Sutcliffe with the hammer
I'll get me coat'"
Tell the 1970's I said 'hello'.
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 936 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Aug 2007 | 17 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Aug 2024 | May 2022 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
34914_1334087324.jpg :d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_34914.jpg |
|
| Liam Gallagher, Russell Brand, George Michael, Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell...
... it's a good job they don't do drug tests for the closing ceremony.
[i(thanks to Sickipedia)[/i
|
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 20628 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Mar 2009 | 16 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Aug 2016 | Aug 2016 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
44480_1390845286.jpg It's been fun.:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_44480.jpg |
|
| BREAKING NEWS:
RVP has failed his medical at Man United. Doctors say its a back problem which was caused by carrying Arsenal for the past year
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Star | 5202 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Apr 2012 | 12 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2018 | Jan 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
67329_1392756525.jpg Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What's down in the dark will be brought to the light:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_67329.jpg |
|
| Edit
|
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Star | 5202 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Apr 2012 | 12 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2018 | Jan 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
67329_1392756525.jpg Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What's down in the dark will be brought to the light:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_67329.jpg |
|
| So you can use polish and somali's in a joke but cant use the word pakistani ?
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Chairman | 3115 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Dec 2001 | 23 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2019 | Jul 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
: |
|
| Have go at the Germans or the French.
They are safe. You can insult them as much as you like. Especially the Germans.
|
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Star | 5202 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Apr 2012 | 12 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2018 | Jan 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
67329_1392756525.jpg Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What's down in the dark will be brought to the light:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_67329.jpg |
|
| Quote: billypop "Have go at the Germans or the French.
They are safe. You can insult them as much as you like. Especially the Germans.'"
Just dont mention the war haha
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
International Star | 5202 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Apr 2012 | 12 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Jan 2018 | Jan 2018 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
67329_1392756525.jpg Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What's down in the dark will be brought to the light:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_67329.jpg |
|
| A policeman stopped me the other night, he taps on the window of the car and says:
'Would you please blow into this bag, Sir'.
I said: 'What for, Officer?'
He says: 'My chips are too hot'.
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
"My dog's crosseyed, is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him"
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's crosseyed? "
"No, because he's really heavy"
2 tommy cooper classics
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 5506 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Mar 2010 | 15 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Sep 2024 | Jun 2024 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
50774_1329287946.jpg :d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_50774.jpg |
|
| Quote: Legends and Icons "A policeman stopped me the other night, he taps on the window of the car and says
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 2786 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Mar 2010 | 15 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
May 2013 | May 2013 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
users/saints.gif :users/saints.gif |
|
| Aging Aunt Mildred was a 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death.
Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out his old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart, since it was badly broken in the first place.
Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be on a woman. The doctor said, 'Your heart would be just below your left breast'.
Later that night......... Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Player Coach | 936 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Aug 2007 | 17 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Aug 2024 | May 2022 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
34914_1334087324.jpg :d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_34914.jpg |
|
| Two boys were kicking a rugby ball around in the park when one was attacked by a Rottweiler. As the dog held the boy by the throat the other boy quickly picked up a nearby branch, pushed it through the dog's collar and twisted it until he snapped the dog's neck.
A passing newspaper reporter witnessed the incident and ran to the boys and told them he was going to put the lad's bravery on the front page.
"I see the headline now, 'Leeds fan saves pal' "
"But I'm not a Leeds fan" said the lad.
"How about 'Bulls fan is a hero' "
"But I don't support Bradford either, I'm a KR fan."
The next day the paper ran the headline:
"Hull b------d kills family pet"
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Club Owner | 12006 | No Team Selected |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Jul 2003 | 21 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Mar 2019 | Oct 2014 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
6278_1381491357.jpg [b:3ekusm3q][color=#FF0000:3ekusm3q]WIGAN RLFC[/color:3ekusm3q][/b:3ekusm3q]:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_6278.jpg |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rank | Posts | Team |
Club Coach | 6206 | |
Joined | Service | Reputation |
Oct 2004 | 20 years | |
Online | Last Post | Last Page |
Dec 2013 | Dec 2013 | LINK |
Milestone Posts |
|
Milestone Years |
|
Location |
|
Signature |
10303_1313522771.jpg Bolton by birth,
Irish by blood,
LEYTHER by heart and soul!!
[quote="BBC Sport":suio7kr3]30/04/06 "Some of W*gan's travelling fans headed towards the exit before it was even over.".................no change there then!![/quote:suio7kr3]
[quote="Wembley71":suio7kr3].....They are our people. Drummond, Costello, Manfredi, Svabic, Martyn, Street, Tickle, Patel, Mossop, Horo, Bristow, Leuleui, Varley, Fleary, Rivett, Tabern, Doran, Woods, Donlan, Wilshire, Leaefa, Hansen, Sale, Murphy… these are all my people.
As a Leyther, you’re one of us the moment you come here to wear the shirt. I don't care where you were born, what colour you are, what religion you are, what language you speak. You're one of us, part of our culture, writing our history as you create your own, and making us stronger for it....[/quote:suio7kr3]:d7dc4b20b2c2dd7b76ac6eac29d5604e_10303.jpg |
|
| I've recently joined an incredibly neat, tidy and fussy Rock tribute band......OC/DC!!
|
|
|
|
|
|