FORUMS > The Sin Bin > Sarah's Law.... advice needed please . |
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| I'd speak to the police again in your shoes. The other person that might be able to help/point you in the right direction is if you can find out who your local Child Protection/Safeguarding officer is at the local council.
I can't stand hysteria or vigilante type action (as I've said before on here it cost us our home when my sister died), however no adults should be approaching a 5 year old child about staying overnight without prior discussion/permission from the child's parents. That is odd, and concerning, behaviour imo.
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| Quote: Mintball "On the basis of just what is written in the OP, I'd agree completely.
But the hysteria is a reality – and rlwe know where it leadsrl.
'"
Nobody is getting hysterical.
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| Quote: BaldRick "A year or three ago we had new neighbours move in opposite us . They kept coming over and asking my (then) 5 yr old lad to go with them for a walk in the woods with his puppy . This caused concerns . I rang the police , and within 20 mins we had two family liaison officers at our door . They could not tell us if there was anything to be concerned about , but they did say that they WOULD NOT say there was NOT a problem .
I had a word with the neighbours , and we have seen and heard very little from them until recent weeks . They have now started approaching my 5 yr old daughter and have been asking her if she wants to have a sleep-over at their house .
My gut feeling is that I should just burn them in their sleep . My sensible side tells me that I should use Sarah's Law and request information from the local police station . BUT .. I have been informed that Sarah's Law is a myth as it has not been passed by parliament .
Any advice as to what action I can (legally) take would be very much appreciated .
Am actually hoping Minty will reply to this post . She seems to have done her research , and be rather well informed and level-headed regarding most subjects .
No 'BURN THE PAEDOS' responses please .'"
If the police are aware that there is a problem they will be monitoring the situation as will other agencies, especially now concerns have been raised.
Personally I think the best thing you could do is to have a word with these neighbours and tell them you are not comfortable with them asking your 5 yr old to stay over or go for walks etc.
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| Quote: DHM "Nobody is getting hysterical.'"
I did not say they were getting hysterical here.
There is, however, a culture of hysteria about the issue. The link illustrated what happens as a result. There were riots around it. If that's not a result of mass hysteria, it's difficult to know what is.
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| Quote: DHM "Quote: DHM "The tabloid media in particular is massively guilty of whipping up hysteria.
There is far, far more danger of a child being abused in their own home by a relative or family friend than elsewhere.
'"
Correct. But this is extremely strange behaviour, and although it's rare it does happen.
I have two kids and I don't know anyone who has had sleepovers even with their friends families at 5, let alone two fairly random adults. I personally don't think kids that young should have sleepovers, just me. And you are right, even if you "know" someone you don't really know them that well to trust your 5 year old with them overnight.
I would be very concerned about these people.'"
My five year old son has had friends sleep over and he's slept over at other friends' houses. Unless we assume that everyone is a paedophile until they prove otherwise, I don't see the problem.
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| Quote: Rock God X "My five year old son has had friends sleep over and he's slept over at other friends' houses. Unless we assume that everyone is a paedophile until they prove otherwise, I don't see the problem.'"
The reasons I have for thinking sleepovers for very young children are not something I would do are nothing to do with paedophiles.
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| Dont bother informing the police, you'll only end with social services sniffing around you.
Have a quiet word with the bloke not to go anywhere near your child ever again, or you won't be responsible for your actions.
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| Quote: DHM "Quote: DHM "My five year old son has had friends sleep over and he's slept over at other friends' houses. Unless we assume that everyone is a paedophile until they prove otherwise, I don't see the problem.'"
The reasons I have for thinking sleepovers for very young children are not something I would do are nothing to do with paedophiles.'"
Oh. What are they then?
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| Quote: DHM " I personally don't think kids that young should have sleepovers, just me. And you are right, even if you "know" someone you don't really know them that well to trust your 5 year old with them overnight.
.'"
What did you mean by this, if it wasn't a reference to potential paedophilia?
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| Quote: Rock God X "What did you mean by this, if it wasn't a reference to potential paedophilia?'"
I don't give advice to people how to bring up their kids, and I don't listen to anyone else either. I'm not telling you what to do with your kids - let's get that straight first.
It is a reference to a number of things, I wouldn't trust my mother in law for a number of reasons, my wife's sister dropped our daughter on her head when she was 12 months old and didn't give a $h!t - would Ilet her look after our kids - not a chance. I've seen people "do" things with their kids that I wouldn't allow mine to do many people think it's perfectly okay for a 5 year old to roam the streets, if they happen to be looking after mine then what if they then think it's okay for my 5 year old to roam the streets with theirs? What if they think it'sokay to smoke dope infornt of kids? A good friend of mine has a boy the same age as my son, I won't let him go to his house because his Dad (who is actually an okay bloke I've known for years) seems to think it's okay for his son to have an Xbox live account and play online 18 games (he's 9) with various unknown adults. He also has guns that they get out in the garden. Not for me thanks.
As for very young children, they completely rely on the adults they are with, I am responsible for my kids in ways that nobody else is and nobody else ever will be.
That answer your question?
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| So, a couple of crummy relatives, an utterly irresponsible adult (who's alright really) and some 'what ifs'.
And you extrapolate that to the world in general?
And nobody was telling you what to do with your children: they were reacting to your flat-out 'no, never' comments on a thread about, in essence, concerns re child abuse.
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| Quote: DHM "Quote: DHM "What did you mean by this, if it wasn't a reference to potential paedophilia?'"
I don't give advice to people how to bring up their kids, and I don't listen to anyone else either. I'm not telling you what to do with your kids - let's get that straight first.
It is a reference to a number of things, I wouldn't trust my mother in law for a number of reasons, my wife's sister dropped our daughter on her head when she was 12 months old and didn't give a $h!t - would Ilet her look after our kids - not a chance. I've seen people "do" things with their kids that I wouldn't allow mine to do many people think it's perfectly okay for a 5 year old to roam the streets, if they happen to be looking after mine then what if they then think it's okay for my 5 year old to roam the streets with theirs? What if they think it'sokay to smoke dope infornt of kids? A good friend of mine has a boy the same age as my son, I won't let him go to his house because his Dad (who is actually an okay bloke I've known for years) seems to think it's okay for his son to have an Xbox live account and play online 18 games (he's 9) with various unknown adults. He also has guns that they get out in the garden. Not for me thanks.
As for very young children, they completely rely on the adults they are with, I am responsible for my kids in ways that nobody else is and nobody else ever will be.
That answer your question?'"
Not really. The people you've mentioned are obviously idiots. I wouldn't leave my child with them either. That doesn't account for why you think five-year-olds in general shouldn't have sleepovers.
My son's friends' parents bring up their children differently to how I bring up mine. They seem like caring, responsible people though, and my son is at no greater risk sleeping at their house than he is going to spend the afternoon/teatime there.
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| Quote: Mintball "So, a couple of crummy relatives, an utterly irresponsible adult (who's alright really) and some 'what ifs'.
And you extrapolate that to the world in general?
And nobody was telling you what to do with your children
And this.
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| My daughter will be 10 soon and it is only in this past year that she been on a sleepover (I don't count her nan's house in this). I honestly think at aged 5 she would have never settled in a strange bed anyway, hence it never happened.
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| If it was me I would have gone round and done them both in, you can't take chances with paedos.
Its like Iraq and the WMDs thing, I know there weren't any, but just ask yourself, what if there were? You can't take chances.
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